It had finally come; it had been building for a long long time…years actually. My first ride on a Street Magic, yep all this time and I’d never ridden one. Literally everybody I know or have every met has told me I should ride one. See I’m a relatively destructive person, when a lot of people give me the same good advice I simply ignore it and do the complete opposite. That’s what happened here, I was like “Screw you, I don’t care if it’s the coolest thing in the known universe, I don’t want to ride it” Well I’ll admit it here, right now…man I wish I’d taken this advice earlier. I’d have been having CRAZY TIME all these years…then again I’d probably be very dead too.

CRAZY TIME; this is what I call it. See Suzuki knew it all along when they made this bike…they knew the secret. Magic, no s%$t this bike has magic powers; it easily converts a normal sane person into a complete and utter maniac. Interestingly if you’re already a complete maniac you just stay about the same but grin a lot more…go figure, it’s obviously a complex magical spell. Crazy time started for me about 16.3 seconds after I drove away from picking the Street Magic up. See that’s the amount of time the traffic lights took to change, the second they went green I unleashed the BEAST.

Everything became fair game…I began by blasting down a hill then jumping onto the sidewalk and passing every car in the known universe in one fowl swoop. I screamed inside my helmet in sheer pleasure. This caused the damn thing to fog up and sent me flying through an intersection completely blind. When the visor cleared I found myself bashing my way through a women’s lingerie store; bra’s and panties strewn all over me and laughing like a school boy I burst out the rear entrance and head madly towards the center of town. This is when the fuzz pulled in behind me…no chance; I cut a hard right and head straight into the park. The police car gave chase as I rushed across the fields dodging and weaving around a startled cricket team. I’m not sure what was funnier, the police car chasing a scooter through the park or the fact the scooter was covered in wildly flapping lingerie and on the back was a very cute partially dressed girl I picked up in the store…I work real quick…I pulled a massive jump over 65 stairs and left the police stuck watching my smoke trail from the stairs. Okay, okay…it was only 6 stairs but everything else is true, really. The girls name is Jenna, we’re married now and have twins on the way, Magic and The Fuzz…